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Preferment Course

GuideLast updated November 2026

Who am I after retirement?

After retirement you are still the person who built your career: your skills, values, and drive belong to you, not to the job. The work is separating who you are from what you did, which is exactly what the Identity module of the Preferment course is designed to do.

Why do I feel like I lost my identity when I retired?

Because work supplied much of it: a title, a routine, a team, and a ready answer to "So, what do you do?" When those go, the person remains but the labels disappear. Rebuilding identity means naming the qualities that were always yours and choosing new ways to use them.

The "I used to" problem

Listen to how newly retired professionals introduce themselves: "I used to run a division." "I used to practice law." Every answer points backward. Rarified Life's free presentation names this directly, promising a real answer to "So, what do you do?" in eight weeks, without it starting with the words "I used to."

The fix is not a new title. It is a clear sense of what you value, what you are good at, and what you want to do next, stated in the present tense.

“I spent a few years wandering around like a goldfish in a bowl. Preferment changed all that! I thought work defined me, but I discovered I am so much more. I learned to ‘be’ rather than just ‘do’ on autopilot.”
A Preferment participant

Separate role from self

List what your job required of you. Then list why you were good at it. The second list is your identity; it does not retire.

Move from doing to being

High achievers often run on autopilot: always doing, rarely choosing. Preferment helps you learn to "be" as well as "do", so activity becomes intentional.

Speak in the present tense

By the Launch module you name a mission for this chapter, which gives you a present-tense answer to the question everyone asks.

How Preferment rebuilds identity

The Preferment course runs eight weekly live sessions with Anne van Leynseele. After the Introduction module sets out where you are now, the Identity module focuses on separating who you are from what you did for a living. Motivation then finds what moves you without a paycheck, and Alignment matches your values and strengths to your days.

Anne knows this terrain. She has moved from Los Angeles film and television to Fortune 100 consulting, to an Attorney Advisor role in the Obama Administration, to co-owning an award-winning chocolate farm in Hawaii. Each move required letting go of one identity and building the next.

Want the full picture? Read our overview of retirement transition coaching with the Preferment course, including the curriculum, price, and how enrollment works.

Keep reading

Who am I after retirement?

You are more than your former title. Many accomplished people feel lost because work supplied their identity, routine, and status. Preferment's Identity module helps you separate who you are from what you did for a living, so you can answer 'So, what do you do?' without starting with 'I used to'. One participant put it simply: 'I discovered I am so much more.'

I retired years ago. Is it too late for this course?

No. Preferment is for people navigating life after a career as well as those approaching it. One participant described spending a few years 'wandering around like a goldfish in a bowl' before the course changed that. The Identity and Motivation modules work whether your last workday was last month or several years ago.

Why is Preferment aimed at high achievers?

High achievers often tie their identity tightly to their work, so losing the title, pace, and purpose of a career can feel disorienting. Preferment was built by someone who has lived four reinventions, across film, global consulting, government law, and farming. The course gives driven people structure and a mission rather than open-ended rest.

Is it normal to feel lost after retiring?

Yes, it is common. A meta-analysis cited in 'Retirement Coaching: An Emerging Niche for 2026' found 28% of retirees experience depression, with a 40% spike in depression in the first years after retiring. Feeling lost is a signal to rebuild identity and structure. If low mood persists, talk with a doctor or licensed mental health professional.

Can I take Preferment while I am still working?

Yes. You can start this work without slowing down, without waiting for retirement day, and even if your last day at work is still years away. Starting early lets you arrive at retirement with an answer to 'what now?' instead of spending months figuring it out afterward.

Find a present-tense answer to "So, what do you do?"

Eight weekly live sessions with Anne van Leynseele, the Preferment book, and guided homework. $3,000 investment.